Casting Call
by Kalta79
Summary: Inspired by my Snapshot story, turning the concept of the characters playing different versions of themselves in Advent Children into a series. This is the beginning, explaining the backgrounds of the characters and why they are auditioning for roles in the movie. Most of the FF7 characters are in the story, but I could only tag 4. Next in this series will be called "And Action!"
1. Chapter 1

"Get up!" Tifa exclaimed, shaking Cloud.

"What's the emergency?" Cloud sleepily groused, realizing he was at her place.

"Today's the audition, and we need to look our best. That way we'll get lead roles, and finally become those stars we were meant to be." Tifa reminded him.

"It's too early to be awake." Cloud complained.

"It's not too early when our careers are at stake…I'm tired of being cast in bit roles as some damned floozy…today's going to change all that. So get your ass out of bed!" With that, Tifa pulled the pillows out from under his head, ignoring his cursing as she got out of bed.

"Thanks for that." Cloud snapped as he unwillingly got out of bed as well.

"And thanks for staying up late at the club last night just because those starlets thought you were a big star." Tifa responded heatedly on her way to take a shower before prettying herself up properly for the audition.

Cloud was glad Tifa didn't see him smile. He knew how jealous she got when he was around other women, and he did like to bait her. Besides, their relationship was constantly switching between on and off states, so if she caught him with another woman, it was because he could never remember if they were together that week or not. That's one reason they kept separate apartments. It might be better if they permanently called it quits, but neither of them was quite willing to take that step, because they had been together since they were kids, and didn't know how not to be together. So they kept reuniting, and the makeup sex might be one reason for their having such a tempestuous relationship. And he hadn't yet met a woman with better breasts to replace his ideal pillow.

* * *

Elena woke up in Rude's arms, feeling happy and nervous at the same time. Happy to be celebrating their one year wedding anniversary tomorrow, nervous because of the audition today. She had decided to run for mayor of Midgar, but even though she was still young herself, her advisors suggested some kind of a stunt to capture the youth vote, and staring in an action movie that was going to be filmed in Midgar seemed like a good idea at the time, but now that the day had arrived, doubts were surfacing. She took a deep breath to calm herself down.

"Happy Anniversary." Rude startled her, she hadn't noticed he was awake too.

"That's not til tomorrow." Elena reminded him.

"Well, can we start celebrating now?" Rude asked.

Elena sighed as he tightened his arms around her. She had wanted him since the first time she saw him, catering a charity event where she was the hostess. It wasn't just that he was eye-candy and his English accent had done things to her that she had never told anyone, he was also an extremely talented gourmet chef. Elena had not been able to help herself, and had started hiring him for all the charity fundraisers she hosted in her job as chairwoman of her family's philanthropic foundation. Finally she had gotten sneaky, and had asked him to privately cater a dinner for two, and then pretended that her date had cancelled on her. Rude had felt that she shouldn't be forced to eat alone, and so they had had their first date, and eight months later he had proposed. Elena hadn't been happy with all the fuss it created in the society papers, especially when there had been a subtle trend of making Rude seem like nothing more than a glorified burger-flipper who had gotten his hooks into the Mackintosh heiress. It had taken considerable restraint on her part not to sue the reporters within an inch of their lives for slander.

"Elena?" Rude brought her back to the present.

"Oh, sorry, I was thinking about…"

"Starting our celebration early?" Rude asked hopefully.

Elena sighed again. "I wish we could, but I've got a full schedule this morning, I won't be free til after that silly movie audition. I don't know why I let myself get talked into it…"

"Because you're smart enough be the first woman elected mayor of Midgar. Why don't I meet you there?" Rude suggested.

"Would you? " Elena was grateful at the thought of having someone there with her who wasn't trying to tell her what to say and do like her political team was doing. Like she hadn't learned image control growing up in the spotlight. But Rude was right, she wanted everyone to know that she wasn't just another brainless socialite. Even getting two Master's degrees, one in international business, and another in business law hadn't stopped the gossip, they merely decided that the degrees were bought and paid for.

"Of course I will. You're tensing up, and you need to be relaxed today." Rude said, caressing her arm.

"Yes, yes I do." Elena smiled at her handsome husband, running her hands over his chest. The first time they had had sex, she had been amazed at the shape he kept himself in…it was obvious the first time she saw him that he wasn't out of shape, but he worked out as much as he cooked, and she loved to feel his muscled body under her hands. "Would you help me relax?" Elena's eyes twinkled as she asked him.

"Your wish is my command." Rude covered her body with his.

A little while later, Elena appeared in the foyer of her family's mansion, where her election team had been waiting for quite a while.

"What took you so long? We're half an hour behind schedule already!" her campaign manager exclaimed. "And you're a mess!"

"So let's hurry and catch up." Elena said as she put her other shoe on. "I'll get myself prettied up on the way." She started heading to the door where her limo was waiting, then stopped and look back at the unmoving group. "Well, what are you waiting for? Let's go!"

"You, uh, missed a few buttons." her publicist said.

Elena looked down at her blouse and saw that her bra was clearly visible due to the three buttons she had forgotten to fasten. She blushed as she hurriedly corrected her error. "Okay, let's get this day over with!"

* * *

"Hey honey, look at this!" Yuffie exclaimed, circling something in the newspaper before handing it to her husband over the breakfast table.

"A movie audition? Why would that be interesting?" Reno asked.

"We could use the extra money. And it might be fun." Yuffie replied.

"Yeah, we sure could use the extra money." Reno agreed as he handed the paper back to her, thinking of their student loans, hers for medical school, and his for his Master's degree in art history. "I've got to head to the museum now. What time is the audition?"

"1 pm." Yuffie told him. "I'll text you a reminder."

"Thanks dear." Reno kissed Yuffie absentmindedly on the cheek before leaving.

Yuffie frowned…she loved Reno, but he had seemed so boring lately. When they were first dating, she had found his passion for preserving culture through art as fascinating, and on their honeymoon he treated her like a priceless work of art. And now five years later, once she was in private practice and no longer besieged by the demanding training to become a doctor, that spark wasn't as bright as she remembered it being. Reno only seemed interested in sculptures or paintings by the old Masters lately. She was hoping that being movie stars for a little bit might get their marriage back on track.


	2. Chapter 2

Reeve hoped today would be his big break. He was tired of being a taxi cab driver. He had seen the casting call ad in the paper, and was hoping that he would end up being around celebrities that needed a personal chauffeur.

* * *

Vincent walked over to one of his most troublesome female students, who was more interested in fashion and actors than in mastering the English language.

"What, may I ask, do you find more interesting than Shakespeare?" he asked her in what he hoped was a forbidding voice.

"Oh, nothing Mr. Valentine." the girl replied in a simpering voice, moving her book slightly to cover something.

"A movie audition? That's what you find so fascinating?" Vincent grabbed the piece of paper she tried to hide. "Two hours detention after school today." he announced as he walked back to his desk.

After that class had been dismissed by the bell, he looked at the casting call information more closely. If it paid well enough, he could finally take that long overdue sabbatical he wanted, after ten years of teaching English to unwilling high school students without a vacation.

* * *

"Did you call and tell the airline we're unavailable today?" Shera asked her husband.

"Sure did, but they're going to make us work continuous flights next week to make up for it." Cid told her, trying to keep the annoyance out of his voice that he felt at being grounded.

"I figured as much, but if we pass the auditions today, hopefully we'll finally be able to buy a house big enough for starting a family in." Shera smiled shyly at him.

"Yeah, that's true." Cid said as he smiled back at her, taking her in his arms and kissing her.

* * *

Barret checked his watch. Still plenty of time before the audition…it was merely a formality for him to be there, since he was allowing his investment properties to be used for filming the movie in exchange for his having a role. So he was guaranteed to pass the audition, it was merely what character he was going to play that was unsure. And he was hoping that he'd get some profitable free advertising by being in the movie as well.

* * *

Scarlet walked upstairs to the childrens' bedrooms. "Marlene! Denzel! Are you ready to leave?" she called out.

"Coming!" their voices chimed simultaneously, and they opened the door to their own rooms, running past her down the stairs and to the front door. "Let's go to the audition!"

"Okay, let me just grab the keys." Scarlet enjoyed being their nanny, but their exuberance could be overwhelming at times, and she hoped that they wouldn't turn into snobs if they became child stars. Their parents weren't that involved with the children unless it was to show them off, and it worried her. They were good kids, but they needed more love than they were getting at home.

* * *

"So what are you doing today?" Rufus asked Aerith, as they lay in their bed.

"I heard about auditions today for a movie they're going to be filming here in Midgar. It sounds like fun." Aerith replied.

"Anything with a penis sounds like fun to you." Rufus said without a trace of rudeness or jealousy, caressing her. His so-called relationship with Aerith was mostly one of convenience, they were roommates in an oversized one bedroom apartment, to keep monthly costs down so they could have extra spending money. His job as a cabana boy meant he was surrounded by women all day at work, many of them very attractive, and he was willing to earn bigger tips, since he was saving up to go back to school.

"I'm just a people person." Aerith smiled at him. "Besides, I know you're glad I think your penis is quite fun." she said as she fondled his with one hand, putting her other hand on his cheek and kissing him.

Rufus obliged her unspoken request, and before too long, he had her clawing at his buttocks as she cried out. "I know you're glad I think you're fun as well." he smirked as he got out of bed to take a shower and get ready for work. When he came out of the bathroom, Aerith was still in bed, texting on her cellphone.

"You should come to the audition too, you might earn some extra money." Aerith said. "I bet you'll earn as much in one day acting in a movie as you do acting in one week with all those desperate housewives at the hotel." She got out of bed and went into their walk-in closet where Rufus was getting dressed. "It's at 1pm at the convention center. Tell all those women that I said their husbands said hello. My turn in the bathroom before heading off to work as well." Aerith kissed Rufus, who pulled away when he felt her hands on him.

"Uh-uh, Aerith, you know the rules, only once in the mornings, we need to save our energies for earning money." Rufus knew she didn't enjoy being a waitress, even if it was at an exclusive gentleman's club where the tips tended to be huge the more cleavage you had. Aerith spent hers on fashion and clubbing in her off hours, and he knew that's what she'd like to be able to afford to do all the time, party. "I'll think about the audition, don't wait up for me. It's Friday after all, the weekend crowd will be arriving." Rufus reminded her before leaving.

* * *

"It's time to go, can we finish this another time?" Sephiroth asked his cousins.

"As far as I'm concerned, it's over." Loz said. "Everyone knows Germany is going to win the World Cup this year."

"Dream on, Australia's going to kick your asses!" Yazoo snapped.

"Who cares, soccer is nothing compared to hockey." the Canadian-born Kadaj proclaimed.

Sephiroth took a deep breath, trying not to lose his temper with his cousins. They were all stuntmen who had come to Midgar to try and prove themselves capable of acting as well. All their auditions they went to somewhat irked him, because he had a hidden desire to become a director. And he had decided to go to this audition with them, wanting to try life in front of the camera to get an idea of life behind it. "I'm heading out to the car now, anyone who wants to be a star is free to join me." he said, slamming the door behind him on their sports argument. "Besides, everyone knows American football is the best sport in the world." he muttered under his breath as he got in the car.


	3. Chapter 3

Shalua was surprised at the amount of people who showed up to audition for parts in _Advent Children_ , twice as many as expected. Following the instructions given to her by the director and producer, she counted out the hopefuls in groups of twenty and led into the special room set up that morning. Once she had them all lined up, she asked their name, occupation, and reasons for auditioning, writing it all down. As the wannabe actors looked at each other uncertainly as they weren't sure what was going on, Shalua sat down at the table in the room and waited.

"What do you think?" Zack Fair asked the producer, Mr. Hojo, as they stood looking at the people through a two-way mirror disguised as windows in the room.

"So far, these people couldn't find their way out of an open casket." Hojo snapped.

"Next group please, Shalua." Zack spoke into the microphone, and he saw Shalua touch her earpiece in acknowledgment.

"Thank you all for coming, we'll be in touch." Shalua told the disappointed group.

"Hell of a way to pick a cast." Zack said, to help pass the time and maybe get a little info on why it was being done this way.

"You are merely a director, I don't expect you to understand. To make great film, you must push the boundaries of acceptable risks. You must **experiment**!" Hojo exclaimed.

"Whatever, man." Zack replied. "It's your dime."

Hojo was about to start an argument when he got a look at the current group entering the room. "Hello, who are these people?"

"Please state your name and occupation, ma'am." Shalua requested to the first woman in line.

"You don't know who the hell I am? What kind of a person are you that you haven't heard of me? I'm Tifa Lockhart, you fool!" Tifa snapped.

"I'm the kind of person who has a job." Shalua replied calmly, ignoring Tifa's seething as she caught the implication that she didn't have an acting job right now, meaning she wasn't as important as she thought. "And you are?" Shalua asked, moving onto Cloud.

"Why does that one guy seem so depressed?" Zack wondered aloud as Shalua got information from Vincent. "Oh, he's a high school English teacher, that's why." Zack remembering hating English in high school and not being very nice to his teacher as a result, which he wasn't too proud of now.

"They are perfect!" Hojo was ecstatic when Shalua got through interviewing them all.

"But they're all so different. And most of them aren't even actors." Zack pointed out.

"That's why they are so perfect! This will be a masterpiece!" Hojo was so excited he was starting to drool.

"If you say so." Zack said dubiously.

"I do say so!" Hojo grabbed the microphone. "Shalua, do not let them leave. Bring in chairs and more tables with meals for them all, then bring me their information. I want to see how they interact with each other!"

"How old are you two?" Yuffie asked Denzel and Marlene as chairs were brought in. She and Reno ended up in line right next to the children.

"You'd never believe it, but I'm twelve and she's ten." Denzel said as he and his sister ate their lunch.

"Why wouldn't I believe that? I'm a doctor. I've seen lots of people who don't look their age." Yuffie replied, humoring Denzel. He looked his age, but Marlene did look younger.

"You're a doctor?" Marlene asked in surprise. "I want to be one when I grow up.

Reno stopped listening to his wife's conversation with the children and thought about how to attract more donors to the museum when he felt someone tapping him on the shoulder.

"Hope I'm not interrupting you, I just thought you looked familiar. My name is Rude, and this is my lovely wife Elena." Rude offered his hand to Reno.

"Pleased to meet you. I'm Reno, and that's my wife Yuffie talking to those kids. I think I met you once when you catered an event for donors for the museum I work at. And I recognize your wife from her campaign posters." Reno shook Rude's hand, noticing that the man's other hand was firmly entwined with Elena's, and noticing the way she looked at Rude caused Reno to frown. He couldn't remember the last time Yuffie had looked at him like that.

"Yes I did, and that's why I'll give you some advice. Don't eat any of this food they provided, it's all garbage." Rude informed Reno. "I'm only here for my wife's sake, but I might have to have one of my apprentices be the on-set caterer for the cast and crew if this is what they expect her to eat."

"I don't care if you have other clients, dammit! You're my manager Tseng, you get over here right now and make sure to earn your percentage by getting me top billing!" Tifa yelled into her phone, unaware that she had suddenly become the focus of attention in the room. Yuffie tried to cover the childrens' ears as Tifa started swearing more as she became aware of Aerith.

Finding nothing else to do, Aerith went over to the table that Shalua had been sitting at in the center of the room, and sat on the edge of it, crossing her legs. To keep her free hand busy, the other one having a bottled water in it, she fiddled with the necklace that draped down in between her breasts in the low-cut top she was wearing. Five minutes later, every wife or girlfriend in the room told their man to go stand by the windows where they wouldn't get a good view of Aerith's advertising, and then the women formed a loose semi-circle near Aerith and were glaring at her.

"Is there a problem?" Aerith asked innocently.

"Yeah, you can quit being a damned slut." Tifa snapped.

"Is there a problem?" Rufus repeated Aerith's question as he came to her defense. He pulled her up off the table and put his arms around her waist. It was part of their agreement to pretend to be a couple if they ever got in trouble with an angry jealous lover of their current interest.

"If she's yours, then you'd better keep a tighter leash on her." Tifa told Rufus, who just stared calmly back at her as he drug Aerith away from the angry wives' mob.

"Who is that man?" Aerith said as she noticed Vincent in a corner opposite the one Rufus took her to. "He looks so sad. Maybe he needs cheering up."

"Good luck with that." Rufus scoffed as she walked towards the other man. "I doubt you'll score."

"Hello, I'm Aerith." she introduced herself to Vincent. A few moments later, she was extremely frustrated. He wasn't even looking at her legs or breasts. He just kept staring at the floor as he talked to her.

The next commotion in the room was two-pronged. Rude and Barret were about to get physical because Barret kept trying to convince Elena to invest some of her fortune with him, and wouldn't leave her alone. The other issue was Cid had left Shera with the other wives to go join in the sports discussion amongst Sephiroth and his cousins. The cousins were pissed off when they realized Cid was as big an American football fan as Sephiroth was. Fortunately, Shalua came back into the room holding a big box which she put on the nearest table with a thud.

"You're all hired. Here is everything you need to know about shooting dates and times, your contracts, blah blah blah. You'll each be mailed a copy of the script next week, and if you leak any of it, you'll be fired and hit with a nasty lawsuit." she told them all.

"But you don't have our addresses." Cloud said.

"Yes we do, it's standard procedure for Avalanche Films to run a background check on all employees." Shalua handed a thick folder to everyone and then left again.


End file.
